what's a producer?

it's happening. soon. if you miss me august 8-10, that's what i'll be doing. yehaw.

nervously,
S

faithfully

missed several days worth of
posts.... been on a camping trip
but now im back- been trying to
deal with a breakup and not doing
too good at it... keep getting reeled
back in like the godfather...
"they keep pulling me back in"

dont know what to do about the
heart stuff- doesnt seem to
be any solution/relief in sight...

this is like yelling
"hello" into a big
empty container...

-g

oh yes, she did.

we just received a donation at work that included a playboy publishing book on creative nude photography, circa 1980. my boss showed me and a coworker a photo of a girl with weird, huge, 70s boobs wearing only a macrame plant holder as a necklace. or maybe it was a necklace. um, awkward.

while it was a very funny photo, it's one that i would have laughed at with my friends and a select couple of coworkers. not loudly in front of patrons, and certainly not with my boss.

anyhew, why am i so very timid when it comes to speaking up sometimes?

then....*shudder*... she showed it to a member of the faculty. luckily he's young and hip and he is a bit more advanced, but come on. ew.

cringing with awkwardness,
S

small town

sometimes i wonder what i would be like if i grew up in portland. well, any city with a large number of inhabitants. would i be more competent, confident, jaded, wealthy? i wonder too the ramifications of growing up where i did and when (pop. 16,000 or so, circa 1989 - 199something.) i guess when i say "grew up" i mean where i went to high school. before that it was an even smaller town off of highway 3, not interstate 5.

my dad used to tell me a story when i was little about the witch who lived in the orange groves. he lived on the edge of some orange groves in southern california during the late fifties and he and his sisters would terrify each other with stories of the witch.

i imagined a green expanse dotted with orange blobs. in the center, a rickety wooden windmill that leaned solicitously to the nearest trees. the witch lived in the tower and protected the groves from pests, poachers, and weather. she somehow used the windmill to control storms and the like. none of this is actually what my dad told me, i don't think, but when he described the place, this is what i imagined.

if i grew up in a big city i probably would never have seen a rodeo, tree frogs, or crazy lightning from a geodesic dome.

wistfully,
S

all good things...

finally read watchmen. after hearing about it for years and then seeing the preview for the upcoming movie, i decided to read it. damn.

today was a weird sort of ending-of-things type of day. i finished re-reading the 7th harry potter, watched the last episode ever of star trek the next generation (season 7, btw), and read watchmen. i haven't had a day like that in a while.

i should be going to bed, but after all these endings, i feel sort of cast loose. maybe i'll root around in my bookshelves for an old standby. gibson?

fanatically,
S

swan garden

we tried a new (to us) chinese food restaurant in our neighborhood. it shoulda been the best considering my rule-of-chinese-restaurant: the sketchier, the better. i'll try it again because i love good/bad chinese food.

here's my fortune:
you will be transforming a situation in your life now with a positive attitude.

work, maybe?

uncomfortably full,
S

half-assed

posting quickly before running out to karaoke.

yep.

that's my post for the day.

-s